WTF
Holy shit, I am so fucking pissed off at my father. He says to me that he find it difficult to relate to me, why am I so distant, how come I'm not trying so hard, why am I dropping bombshells on him blah blah blah. FIRSTLY: Difficult to relate? No fucking shit...Him and his lawyer, right-wing fucker friends snickering over the Liberals and NDP while I sit in the other room (TOLD to sit in the other room...God forbid I would disturb his white Neo-Nazi friends)... SECONDLY: Me? Distant? He spent my whole life barely lifting a finger to see me, not sending us money...my mom and I: poverty stricken, him: fucking millionaire. THIRDLY: What bombshells? Is it my fault I felt like sharing a childhood horror with him? Should I have never spoken to him? I know I shouldn't have yelled...when I shared the details with him, I freaked out myself...but why is this a point against me? I felt like trusted him enough, and then he used it against me in an arguement about how I don't respect him or his authority.
I was arguing with him after some fucker hit my little sister Paris on his bike outside. When she went to the hospital, I stayed home with the other twin Pascal, and he came home, and started yelling at me about how I should have kept an eye on her. THAT WAS NOT MY RESPONSIBILITY. Sarah (my step-sister) and I made a deal, after out first decent conversation ever, that she was looking after Paris outside and I was helping Pascale with her homework inside.
NOT ONLY did she pin it on me after she ditched OUR BABY SISTER outside by herself (not baby...4, but FUCK man), but when I called her on it later, she shrugged and said "Does it really matter? Parry is going to be fine."
I love my baby sisters so much, and she had the fucking guts to blame me for Paris' first concussion. I would have hit her, had she been a boy...but I don't hit women.
This is what triggered my father yelling at me. I told him, "Joel, Sarah said she was going to look after her, not me."
And he said, "You should have been watching her anyway."
So I said, "Because Sarah's unreliable?"
And he started getting mad at me. "No, because its your duty." (Which, when he left, he gave us BOTH the instructions to watch them."
Anyway, its escalated into him blaming me for it, telling me that if I don't respect the people in the house I should get out, telling me to stop telling disturbing "STORIES" about my childhood, and to let go of the fact that he didn't love my mom. He tried to finish by yelling that if I'D been in the house when my mom was killed, maybe that would have prevented it. (Excuse me? Blaming ME for the death of my mother?????)
And when I said it was bullshit, he told me to keep my language in check around my other sister (who looked upset, sitting on the couch, curled up). I told him that I would voice my opinions when I wanted and how dare he blame me and he finished the whole thing by punching me.
Left, ended up at Eric, he drove me to Lance, we smoked up, and I borrowed his laptop to vent this...
Holy SHIT
JV
I was arguing with him after some fucker hit my little sister Paris on his bike outside. When she went to the hospital, I stayed home with the other twin Pascal, and he came home, and started yelling at me about how I should have kept an eye on her. THAT WAS NOT MY RESPONSIBILITY. Sarah (my step-sister) and I made a deal, after out first decent conversation ever, that she was looking after Paris outside and I was helping Pascale with her homework inside.
NOT ONLY did she pin it on me after she ditched OUR BABY SISTER outside by herself (not baby...4, but FUCK man), but when I called her on it later, she shrugged and said "Does it really matter? Parry is going to be fine."
I love my baby sisters so much, and she had the fucking guts to blame me for Paris' first concussion. I would have hit her, had she been a boy...but I don't hit women.
This is what triggered my father yelling at me. I told him, "Joel, Sarah said she was going to look after her, not me."
And he said, "You should have been watching her anyway."
So I said, "Because Sarah's unreliable?"
And he started getting mad at me. "No, because its your duty." (Which, when he left, he gave us BOTH the instructions to watch them."
Anyway, its escalated into him blaming me for it, telling me that if I don't respect the people in the house I should get out, telling me to stop telling disturbing "STORIES" about my childhood, and to let go of the fact that he didn't love my mom. He tried to finish by yelling that if I'D been in the house when my mom was killed, maybe that would have prevented it. (Excuse me? Blaming ME for the death of my mother?????)
And when I said it was bullshit, he told me to keep my language in check around my other sister (who looked upset, sitting on the couch, curled up). I told him that I would voice my opinions when I wanted and how dare he blame me and he finished the whole thing by punching me.
Left, ended up at Eric, he drove me to Lance, we smoked up, and I borrowed his laptop to vent this...
Holy SHIT
JV
posted by Mr. Death at 4:08 p.m.
9 Comments:
Don't worry about it. He's just being an asshole.
Though, regarding him hitting me, I could say I'm used to being slapped around by people (I am), but there was no excuse. If I was any angerier, I would have called the police out of spite...
It's not a bad one, and I figure I deserved it in the first place.
JV
punching you is SO NOT ON! - sorry, but i draw the line there - if i knew his name i would report him.
this so sucks! after i though you had made a humongous effort to get to know him better, and him you. Stupid him for not realizing what a huge step you made in opening up to him. I feel like giving him a good SHAKE!
too bad he can't read my comment - he is behaving like a real jerk! Sounds like HE needs some counselling. How old is Sara, i forget?
take care kiddo, try not to beat up on yourself now too, o.k.?
luv,
pj
Sarah's my age...maybe slightly older month wise.
Yeah, I'm going to give him a real earfull...Thinking about calling him at work and yelling at him there: ruining his day and his mood. ;)
JV
That's terrible! It doesn't look like he's trying anymore. And no, you don't deserve it. Although my father would probably think you do... but I suppose that's how fathers and their man-of-the-house egos think. Not your fault at all.
You don't hit girls? Then you shouldn't hit anybody. Or you'll be the same as your father. And I suppose now you know how it feels to be blamed unfairly so don't do it to others. I think that you should take him as a negative example and make sure you never become like him.
Be careful with your sister. She sounds rather untrustworthy. Take care. *hugs*
no one desewrves to be hit or told they could be responsible for their own mums death im sorry he did this to you.
Sounds he doesn't get you, and never got you. And in my opinion, he doesn't deserve to know you.
I was more shocked then hurt: seriously, people, he's never EVER hit anyone.
And as for the issue of not hitting anyone myself: I do have a psychotic disorder, its not totally me that wants to beat the crap out of jerks.
And I don't think he's stopped trying. I think that I was being enough of an asshole that he lapsed into a weak spot...he called Lance's house looking for me like 40 times until Fran told him I was fine, and not to call again.
JV
My mom always taught me to be as logical as I can be...and even though I hate him, part of him was justified, I guess. I'm going to leave him to beat himself up for now.
I'm the most angry that he had to drag my mom into it.
JV
It's tough when you have a parent you get along with. I love my father and he loves me but boy do we ever not get each other!
Your father, I'm sorry to say, sounds like a right jerk.
Just try to do right by your little sisters. They really need you.
Peace.
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